||[Feb. 8th, 2013|08:18 pm]
Our Letters to the World
I hate you. You are a liar, a cheater, and most of all- a coward. From the day we met, you made me believe that you cared and that I mattered. I gave you every bit of my heart and soul. I shared everything I am with you, I let you in to my heart. I was involved with your family, your friends and took a part in your interests regularly. I never judged who you were or where you came from, every story you shared or moment of weakness you may have felt- I tried my hardest to help and take some of that pain off of you. There is nothing more I could have done, I am not the problem. You are the asshole who with your bare white hands, ripped out my heart and stomped on it. Then shoved it in a wood-chipper and watched as it shred to pieces. Next when I thought you were done- ANOTHER jab at my heart. You gathered up what was left of the pieces and buried them… you abandoned me. You left when I needed you. You left when I needed my best friend, my lover and my boyfriend. I still cannot believe all of the hell you put me through that you will probably never know about.
It has been over 2 months and I still have not heard your voice since you sat on my couch that night crying, telling me that you loved me more than any woman and how wonderful I was. But then you kissed my dog- yes MY DOG- and hugged me tightly as I felt your tears fall onto my head while you were sobbing. You told me that you loved me and would see me soon and left.
I replay over and over and OVER in my head that last week of our relationship. The only feeling I have when I think about it is disgust. You and your family meant the world to me-especially your sweet grandma, may she rest in peace. I remember vividly every second from the time you told me that she had passed to the day we laid her to rest. It is a shame you did not get her good heart, but I am so glad that she is not here to see the coward you really are. She would be so disappointed- I know I am.
To think that the man I was madly in love with had me replaced before he even broke up with me is absurd. You really are an asshole. You are a piece of shit, good for nothing, two timing man who will in time get to feel the repercussions of your actions and pain you have caused me. I do not need to wish you to hell – honey, you have RSVP’d yourself to the list. I am sure I am not the first, nor the last that you have done this too. But thank you for letting me off easy and taking yourself completely out of my life and allowing me to focus on what really matters- my success and happiness. I did not know how lost I really was until I was left high and dry with nothing and no one.
I am a firm believer in karma and yours is coming.
As for my replacement- well she can keep you. She can learn the hard way that YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE. This will happen to her just as you both did this to me. I believe that the best revenge you can give to woman who takes your man- is to simply let her keep him.
I am the lucky one. You let me free. You helped me rebuild my walls and rethink my actions and
There will come a day that you will realize that you let go of the best thing that ever happened to you. You will be sad and hurt. You will wonder where I am and what I am doing, who I am with and do I still love you. And on that day- the sun will shine a little brighter on me. I will walk with a new found confidence, a new happiness. I will, on that day, realize that I do not remember the sound of your voice, the warmth of your touch or the way you once made me feel- and I will not miss a thing.
That day will be a great day- and it is coming soon.